Not Sure But Willing to Try

I have no options in this
I have no where to turn
I am stuck here
And my mind is fixated on this moment

And this moment must be as it is
And this flow of thoughts is what it is
Unaffected by nothing, affected by everything
In the chaos I must live

My brain has brought me here and I am loving or hating every minute of it
My brain is my brain and it is my foe and tool and weapon and weakness

Knowing my brain, which I hardly do, I cannot promise you much
I cannot promise you I will be alive in 4 years or that I will be happy in 2 weeks
I cannot promise you I will do what I promise to do

This does not make unreliable, it makes me truthful

I will fight away the darkness
Or I will let the darkness blind me
I will give it my best and succeed
Or I will break under the pressure of life

I am curious about my future. All I know is that it won't be easy and it won't be boring.